


kintsugi

by newct127



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Getting Back Together, I don't know what else, Jury Duty, M/M, Memories, Moon Taeil-centric, Non-Linear Narrative, Post-Break Up, somewhat graphic descriptions of murder cases, true crime loving exes try to solve a crime while on jury duty the fic, true crime talk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:40:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28152501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newct127/pseuds/newct127
Summary: “Do you know anyone on the jury?” the judge asks. Taeil innocently looks at the people in the jury box, though he already knows the answer he's going to give.“I thought I did, your honor.”It’s not a complete lie. It’s up to the judge to interpret it however she wants to.“That’s a no then,” the judge says and moves onto juror number 2.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Moon Taeil
Comments: 8
Kudos: 73





	kintsugi

**Author's Note:**

> okay. so this little shit has been on my idea list for months. i was watching james acaster's stand up collection and he mentioned jury duty and i went 🤩🤩. next bit was figuring out whether it's possible to be on the same jury with your ex and it apparently is, IF YOU LIE, which i found out from [this article](https://www.robotbutt.com/2018/11/01/i-was-on-the-same-jury-as-my-ex-and-we-refused-to-agree-with-each-other/). DON'T PERJURE YOURSELF KIDS  
> and now we're here.  
> rated m cause of murder and true crime talk
> 
> kintsugi is the japanese art of repairing broken pottery by gluing the pieces together with lacquer that has powdered gold, silver or platinum mixed within it. it's also an amazing song by gabrielle aplin.

  


Taeil shows up in the courthouse with his letter in hand, visibly excited. He’s living his best life right now.

His interest in true crime first started when he was in high school. He stumbled onto a video online talking about Madeleine McCain, and he was hooked onto finding out more. When he got bored with that story and frustrated with the lack of conclusion, there was another one for him to look into. And another.

It’s a never ending cycle of mystery and intrigue. Sure, there are gory details, but Taeil’s desensitized. He can deal with gore easily.

This is his once in a lifetime opportunity, every true crime nerd’s dream come true. He’s going to take advantage of this, fully. He’ll do the task to the best of his abilities. He crosses his fingers and wishes it goes well so he gets picked to be on the jury.

His excitement deflates a few moments after he steps into the courtroom. He takes a seat in the benches and makes himself comfortable.

That’s when he sees him. It’s only from the back but Taeil recognizes his shoulders and neck everywhere. He’ll never be able to forget him. He can’t let that ruin it for him.

Taeil has a vague idea of how the system works. He knows they’ll ask questions and he knows some of the rules. He knows that question will be asked. He’s gonna say no.

And that’s what he does. Kind of. He’s also kind of shady.

“Do you know anyone on the jury?” the judge asks. Taeil innocently looks at the people in the jury box, though he already knows the answer he's going to give.

“I thought I did, your honor.”

It’s not a complete lie. It’s up to the judge to interpret it however she wants to.

“That’s a no then,” the judge says and moves onto juror number 2.

Phew. He can stay for now.

The question gets asked to the other potential jurors, then they enter the really long process of being questioned by the prosecutor and the defense lawyers.

In the end Taeil’s glad he didn’t say he doesn't know him, and not only because he gets to stay, but because hearing him say it doesn’t feel nice at all. It just brings up memories of when they did know each other. Back before Taeil felt like a part of him is missing.

* * *

_**1 year, 4 months, 18 days before the breakup** _

  


Taeil is minding his goddamn business. That’s how he meets him. A lot of puzzle pieces come together to make their meeting a reality. It makes his life better, Taeil says then. After they break up and he can't get himself to move on, he's not so sure.

“Are you alone?”

At first sight Taeil is impressed. Not because he doubts himself or lacks self confidence, but because he’s never experienced this. Hot men aren’t available. Hot men don’t usually chase, they’re being chased. This motherfucker is going against everything Taeil knows.

He doubts that this man is the love of his life. But he is interested to find out exactly who he would be to him.

“I’m waiting for my friends, they’re running a little late.” The man nods, taking it in. He realizes the dismissal in Taeil’s voice, it seems, but he then attempts again.

“Are you sure they’re not standing you up?”

“Yep, I’m sure,” Taeil responds, his eyes focusing on the Wikipedia article he has open on his phone. The stranger picks up on this too.

“What are you reading there?” he asks, gesturing towards Taeil’s hands with a glance.

Well. He is sure the answer will turn the suitor away.

“I’m reading about the murder of Dana Bradley.”

“I haven’t heard of that one,” the stranger smiles before he introduces himself, “I’m Jaehyun.”

“I’m Taeil.”

“Can I keep you company until your friends show up? You can tell me all about Dana Bradley?”

Taeil sees the dimples then and immediately thinks that it sounds too good to be true. There has to be a catch.

“In exchange for what?”

Jaehyun’s smile widens. He sits down on the chair next to Taeil as if Taeil has already agreed. He might. It’s really tempting.

“Your number,” Jaehyun tells him. That was actually kind of smooth, he has to admit it.

“How about you buy me a drink, I’ll tell you about Dana, and I’ll see whether or not I want to give you my number later.”

The offer is more than good enough.

“Sounds good to me.”

* * *

He gets picked to be on the jury and it’s the proudest moment of his life to date.

Too bad Jaehyun is here too.

He gets to go home every night, which is amazing, but it’s too bad that he isn’t allowed to go online, watch TV or even read the newspaper. He makes a plan on how to manage through the trial. He gets some books and notifies all his friends that he’ll have to keep contact to a minimum once the trial starts.

Ten laughs at him for not getting out of it. Ten knows Taeil loves this type of stuff, but he also has a point. It’s a bit of a pain in the ass. And he won’t know how long the trial will go for until it’s over.

Taeyong’s much more supportive. Instead of any comments about how miserable Taeil will be, Taeyong just offers to drop him off some food every few days or so.

He doesn’t mention Jaehyun at all. They don’t need to know that. It’s not like Taeil will get to talk to him anyway. They’re not supposed to talk about anything beside the case, and they can only do that in the jury room, with the other jurors present. So it doesn’t matter, really.

He only finds out what the trial is about on the day it begins. He had heard of the Gorski case online, because of course he has, he keeps up to date with interesting topics like that one. And the murder is so damn intriguing.

It’s murder. That’s exactly what Taeil wanted it to be. He knows so much about murders.

Too bad Jaehyun is here too.

Not that he expects Jaehyun to do or say something that would get in the way. Despite what happened in the end, Taeil still has a feeling that Jaehyun cares too much to say anything.

It’s just that he’d enjoy it more if he wasn’t reminded of the happy days he had with the person he loves.

* * *

_**7 months, 17 days before the breakup** _

  


“Nu-uh. I don’t get sick.”

Taeil knows he’s feeling like shit, but he can’t let it be true. It’s Saturday, the weekend. They’re supposed to be going out with Jaehyun’s friends tonight. He can’t get sick and make Jaehyun miss out on the fun. He was looking forward to it, but Jaehyun was looking forward to it more. He can’t have him stay behind. But by the look on his face, that’s exactly what Jaehyun will do.

“Taeil, love, I’m pretty sure you have a fever. And you sound like you can barely breathe.” Jaehyun tries to reason with him, but Taeil decides to be stubborn about this. Jaehyun needs to go see his friends. He needs to enjoy himself after the long work week. And Taeil, well he can just suck it up for one night. It’s whatever. His boyfriend deserves a break, it’s his first day off in like two weeks.

“Nonsense,” Taeil snorts and clears his throat, hoping that will miraculously cure it. It doesn’t. The shivers come in next, as soon as he denies that he doesn’t feel well. He hopes Jaehyun doesn’t notice. “I’m just a little tired. I’m gonna go take a nap in your bed. I’ll be fine when I wake up and then we’ll go out.”

“Okay, love, you go do that,” Jaehyun says it with a knowing smirk on his lips. He looks worried too. Taeil feels like he won the lottery the day he met Jaehyun. But that only lasts a second. “Call me if you need anything,” Jaehyun adds.

Pfft. He has Jaehyun’s entire king-sized bed and his expensive duvet. What else could he possibly need?

He gets into Jaehyun’s bed within moments and makes himself comfortable. The duvet Jaehyun has is usually so warm, but this time it isn’t. The longer he lies, the colder he gets, the shivers really settling in. His fingers and feet feel like blocks of ice, and there’s this spot in between his shoulder blades that he doubts he’ll ever be able to feel warmth in.

Taeil doesn’t have a choice. He does need something.

“Jaehyunnie?” he calls, the discomfort in his throat becoming stronger in this position. Jaehyun rushes to the room, Taeil can hear the fast footsteps approaching the room. He speaks the moment he sees him walk through the doorway. “I’m really, really cold. Come cuddle.”

“Love, you need to see a doctor.”

Taeil now has a different reason for not wanting to do it and it has to do with how comfortable he feels. Cold, but if he gets up he’ll be colder.

“I don’t want to go to the doctor, I don’t want to get up.”

Jaehyun walks to the bed and puts his hand on Taeil’s forehead, checking his temperature.

“Come on, you big baby. For me. We’ll get you some meds after and I’ll cuddle you until Monday,” Jaehyun speaks in a low, soothing tone, attempting to coerce Taeil into saying yes with a soft smile across his lips.

“But we’re supposed to go out.”

“Sure. Let's spread germs. That’s a really smart idea.”

“In some countries,” Taeil starts, knowing very well how much Jaehyun loves those stories of his, “they drink to feel better. Spirits disinfect the throat so the soreness goes away.”

“You have a sore throat, not just a clogged nose?” Taeil gulps and feels scratching at the back of his throat. Yeah, that’s definitely getting worse. He nods. “How about we rely on modern medicine this time.”

“I’m so cold Jae.”

“I know just the thing you need,” Jaehyun tells him and smiles softly. Taeil watches him as he opens his closed and without much thinking or browsing, Jaehyun pulls out a cardigan. He sits up and lets Jaehyun baby him by helping him put it on. It’s soft and chunky, and really warm, and it feels like being hugged. Taeil really wants to keep the cardigan, he decides. “Better?”

“Yes, so much better.”

Jaehyun rolls his sleeves all the way up when they get in the car. He puts the heating on the highest, and turns on the seat warming for Taeil. Oh, the perks of having a boyfriend with an expensive car.

The wait in the hospital isn’t too long and the doctor they see is kind and isn’t weirded out by Taeil being a grown man acting like a child, or the equally grown man indulging him. It’s nothing more than a cold, a serious one, but still just a cold. They soon get to go back to Jaehyun’s apartment, after picking up vitamins and the meds the doctor prescribes.

Jaehyun delivers what he promises. He calls his friends to cancel and explain, and he remains in bed with Taeil for the rest of the weekend.

On Monday, Taeil goes home with Jaehyun’s cardigan still on his body. He somehow ends up never giving it back. Jaehyun never mentions it either.

What he does mention is how needy Taeil becomes when he gets sick. It becomes an inside joke between them that gets brought up far too often. But it’s theirs. Taeil wouldn’t have it any other way.

* * *

The accused of the murder of the so-called Gorski case is Jakub Gorski’s wife, Natalie Gorski. Jakub Gorski’s family are Polish immigrants that have lived here since before Jakub was born. They are side-eyeing Natalie during the whole time they’re in the courtroom.

Jakub was stabbed in the heart with a knife that the prosecution is claiming the defendant, Natalie Gorski, owned. The knife was never found, but what ties her to the crime scene is a strand of hair with her DNA. A strand of hair that could have gotten there in so many ways. But that is all the prosecution has when it comes to physical evidence. And the defense isn’t great at defending, really.

It’s always the husband. It’s always the boyfriend. He’s read that so many times. It goes the other way around too. It’s always the wife. The way his family is looking at her only adds to the drama. Taeil is compassionate. But he probably has drool coming out of his mouth cause everything about the case is just so good. It’s just like the very intriguing cases he reads about online.

It’s all circumstantial evidence. That’s what makes it better. It’s based on hearsay and stories about the relationships between the members of the Gorski family, and so many character witnesses. The fucking character witnesses.

Taeil has no idea who to believe. The prosecution that claims this, the defense claims that, and it’s all just so silly. Nothing makes complete sense, the toggle stopping at ‘somewhat makes sense’ during the entire trial. Each day he’s more and more convinced that it’s the wife, but he knows that something’s off about the whole thing.

He decides it’s not the trial, the evidence, or any of that. Jaehyun is to blame why he’s feeling that things are off.

Natalie Gorski is guilty. And Jung fucking Jaehyun is throwing him off his rhythm. Just like he always does.

* * *

_**1 year, 2 days before the breakup** _

  


Jaehyun is romantic as fuck. That’s how Taeil describes him whenever his friends ask anything about how they’re doing. He learns that about him soon after they met, but it only sets in that Jaehyun is really freaking romantic once they start dating. He’s a sap. He remembers little off the cuff comments that Taeil makes about stuff he likes, and he incorporates them in their dates. Jaehyun cares a whole bunch and sometimes Taeil is afraid that he doesn’t care enough cause Jaehyun always outdoes him. Especially when it comes to planning dates. Taeil tries. Jaehyun just kind of knows the place.

That’s how the first time they say I love you ends up happening in an escape room. It’s not an accidental confession either. Jaehyun has it planned. He doesn’t just say it. He has flowers and mood lighting, and ‘I love you’ is the final clue Taeil needs to figure out so they can get out, and Taeil has no doubt that he got the organizers of the escape room to help.

He’s speechless at first. If Ten was here he’d ask if it’s maybe too soon. It might be.

Taeil just knows that he loves him too.

So he says it back.

He never doubts that he’s in love with Jaehyun. He’s still sure that he’s in love with Jaehyun.

* * *

Taeil tries not to be biased, but for the entire 16 days of the trial the prosecutor talks with such conviction that he manages to persuade him fully. What does it for him is Natalie’s letter, the one she wrote a week before the murder happened.

So as it turns out, Natalie and Jakub were going through a bit of a rough patch, one could say. Natalie had apparently cheated on Jakub a few months before and they were trying to fix that. That’s what the prosecution says. The defense says there was no cheating from either side. Taeil is more inclined to believe Jakub got cheated on just because he himself got cheated on. Juror number 1 might have a grudge against juror number 8 because of the same reason, and that grudge is clouding his judgment. But that’s not important.

What’s important is that it’s starting to become less gray and more black and white for Taeil. He’s making up his mind about his position on the matter. And he’s starting to change his mind. He’s thinking less about how fun the experience is too. The job at hand is to get justice for the victim. That’s exactly what he will do, especially because he was a Jakub. Minus the getting murdered part.

* * *

_**The breakup** _

  


Jaehyun’s distant. He’s there, and they have moments where it feels like nothing’s wrong, and they’re happy. But it only lasts during those moments.

Jaehyun changes. He isn’t as open, as bubbly as he was when he and Taeil first started dating. For the last month it's been like he isn’t himself anymore, rather a memory of himself.

They’re spending more time at Taeil’s. They don’t go to Jaehyun’s apartment at all in the last month, he rarely stays over for the night despite Taeil asking, they don’t go out a lot either. They’re kind of confined to Taeil’s, and it’s not like he minds, but he wonders why it is that way. He wonders why Jaehyun holds him so tight lately, why the sex has gotten even better, and why Jaehyun is getting clingy while being kind of absentminded at the same time.

Taeil has only one theory, an obvious thing that he refuses to take seriously at first. As time passes, it’s the only explanation he can come up with.

The breakup happens Friday evening. Luckily. That way Taeil gets the weekend to bawl his eyes out and gather himself so on Monday he can act like everything’s fine.

It all starts when Taeil gets home from work. He fills the bathtub and puts on a murder documentary so he can forget about the stress of the day. He leaves the bathroom door open, and ups the volume on the TV. That'll keep him company while he soaks and relaxes his muscles.

He doesn’t choose the best documentary for his mood. It’s one he’s seen, cause those are the ones that he goes for when he’s really, really stressed. He can’t deal with new things, he needs well-known ones. Stories he already knows the ending to, that help him remember that there is a solution for every problem. Including whatever he’s struggling with.

He’s just so stressed and tired. So worried about whatever’s going on between him and Jaehyun. Just, so, so tired.

Jaehyun shows up minutes after Taeil gets out of the bathtub. The documentary is just starting to get to the truth, and Taeil remembers. He realizes why he subconsciously picked that murder. It’s not the best moment for Jaehyun to show up cause Taeil’s stress is suddenly back.

It all escalates from there.

“What are you watching, baby?”

“The Watts family murders.”

“The cheating husband who kills his wife and daughters?” Jaehyun asks, hitting the nail right on the head.

Jaehyun walks to him and leaves a peck on Taeil's lips. It only makes him more bitter.

“Yeah, that’s the one.”

“Such a depressing story.”

“Yeah, but I can kind of relate to it now.”

Taeil doesn’t know why he says it. It would’ve been so much better if he didn’t. But he does, and with it the downfall starts.

“What are you saying?”

“You’re cheating on me.” It’s not a question. Maybe it should’ve been a question.

“I’m what?”

“You’re cheating on me,” Taeil repeats, then begins to list all the reasons why he thinks so, “We don’t go out anymore lately, we stay here in my apartment only, so I can only assume you don’t want to be seen with me anymore. You’re distant and somewhere else in your head at all times,” he says, “I assume you’re thinking about someone else. I kept quiet long enough but it’s starting to really hurt and I can’t deny it anymore. You’re cheating on me.”

Jaehyun looks hurt. He looks caught, and sad, but more than anything, he looks hurt.

“Taeil, I’m not…” he attempts, but Taeil’s made up his mind.

“I think we should break up,” he cuts him off, “That way you can date whoever and I’ll stop being sad because I love you and you don’t love me. Let’s just break up.”

“Is that what you really want?”

“It is.”

“Fine then. I’m cheating on you, I guess,” Jaehyun says, his words sounding flat and tired. He pauses, unsure what to do. Taeil can't believe it's true. Jaehyun's words don't make it easier in any way, “But I do love you. I love you so much. And I’m really, really sorry that I made you feel like I don’t,” he tells him. Out of everything he's said in the last month, this is the sentence that sounds most true. Taeil can see tears forming in Jaehyun’s eyes. That’s what really breaks him, “Goodbye Taeil.”

Jaehyun leaves, but that doesn’t bring Taeil any ease. It’s quite the opposite. For months he thinks about how defeated Jaehyun looked in that moment, and he wonders if he did the right thing.

Jaehyun leaves, and Taeil never sees him again. He never even comes to get his things from Taeil’s apartment, nor do Jaehyun’s friends. He resists all urge to text him, and he never receives a text.

They don’t speak or see each other again.

Not for 1 year, 5 months and 27 days.

* * *

Once the evidence is presented and both the prosecution and defense have said their closing statements, it’s up to the jury to preside and decide. The question they need to answer is whether or not Natalie Gorski is guilty of the murder of her husband.

This is the bit where Taeil will most likely have to talk to Jaehyun. Not about anything personal, but still. This is the scary bit.

They do a good job of avoiding each other so far. But it’s inevitable.

On the first day of the jury deliberation, they end up sitting next to each other. Not by choice. Jaehyun is avoiding him by getting coffee and the stars align in a way that the only empty chair in the conference room is the one next to Taeil. Neither of them can do anything about it without jeopardizing the entire trial. So they sit next to each other, they don’t speak or look at each other, and it’s really fucking awkward but it is what it is.

Taeil has to fight the urge to touch Jaehyun a few times. It’s like muscle memory, and it makes him a little sad because it’s been so long and he should’ve unmemorized it by now. He manages to control himself. It’s not his to touch anyway.

He focuses on the conversation, on the other jurors who talk about the details of the case. He focuses on how much he wishes to get out of there, and away from Jaehyun, and that he can help make that possible by keeping everyone on track.

“We should have a vote to see where we stand, we’ll go from there,” juror number 5 suggests.

Yes. That’s a good place to start. Everything starts somewhere.

* * *

_**1 month, 3 days before the breakup** _

  


It’s the most important day of the year. It has to be or Ten would disown him. Ten’s birthday has to be special and must not be ruined by anything or anyone. It’s law. Just ask Taeyong.

Ten is pretty damn selfless during the year. Sure, he can be sarcastic and so honest that he ends up slapping you in the face with nothing more than words, but he’s also the first one to drop everything and show up for his friends. Taeil wouldn’t miss the occasion for anything. Not that he’s allowed to, but still, he wouldn’t. He shouldn’t because Ten would never. No one should.

Jaehyun ends up doing exactly that though.

He's supposed to come and pick Taeil up so they can go together. But Jaehyun doesn't show up. A short, and very cold text exchange between them results in Taeil finding out that Jaehyun is running a little late. So he's a few minutes behind schedule, no big deal.

Taeil makes his way to the bar, apologizes to Ten for being late as he hands him a very thoughtful gift. And the wait begins. A wait that lasts an hour and a half.

He’s sitting here, nursing his drink, faking smiles and including himself in the conversation. He doesn’t stop thinking about it, the text he sent asking Jaehyun what’s going on, or how every time he excuses himself from the table to try to call him, the call goes straight to voicemail.

Taeyong notices him first, Taeil knows that’s the case because Taeyong keeps glancing towards him.

“Are you okay?” Taeyong asks him a few glances later. Taeil can’t bring himself to say anything. He doesn’t want to ruin Ten’s birthday.

“I’m okay.”

Ten picks up on it soon enough too, and when Jaehyun finally texts that he won’t be able to make it, well past the point when it becomes obvious that he won’t show up, Ten tells him it’s fine and pats his back. Taeil really doesn’t want to ruin the party. He pretends that he’s fine and goes back to faking smiles. But he’s really angry. And he’s really sad too.

This isn’t what was supposed to happen tonight.

He gets back to his apartment at two in the morning. He picks up Jaehyun’s cardigan from the chair he always drapes it over, and he puts it on like he does every time he’s in distress. He falls asleep with a sinking feeling in his stomach.

The next day he finds out Jaehyun’s reason. He accidentally came out to his parents and it didn’t go well.

Jaehyun having to deal with Taeil’s biggest fear isn’t something he can be mad about. He can only hope that he can help him through it.

It’s not a big deal. There is no fight.

But it’s the first really negative emotion he has for Jaehyun since they started dating. In a way, getting stood up that night, even though it’s justified, is the start of the end. It’s the event, and his reaction to it, that Taeil suspects leads to Jaehyun cheating on him.

* * *

Once the votes are in, it’s up to Taeil to read them out.

The question they’re voting on is ‘Is Natalie is guilty: yes or no’. It’s one yes after another. Ten of them total. And then there’s another no, one Taeil put in because though he can say she’s guilty with some conviction, he wants to go over everything before he says yes. And then there’s another no.

“No. I miss you. I want you back and I’ll do anything to make it happen.” Taeil reads out. He recognizes the penmanship so the words sting like salt in an open wound. Nevertheless, he asks. He has to. “Who wrote this?”

“I did,” Jaehyun says. It’s the first time Jaehyun has addressed him since the breakup. His heart isn’t supposed to skip a beat because Jaehyun is talking to him. What kind of pathetic shit is this. He can’t pretend it’s just because of what Jaehyun wrote, either, because he knows exactly why Jaehyun is saying that. It’s not directed at him, it can’t be. There’s no way Jaehyun’s single either. Have you looked at him? He’s taken and not interested. The jitters he’s feeling need to fucking stop. “She wrote that in the letter she send him before the murder and I can’t stop thinking about it.”

“The prosecution already explained that it’s a manipulation tactic. That’s what their relationship was like,” juror number 12 says.

“Yeah, but what if it isn’t? Us looking at it that way works for the prosecution’s narrative. What if she actually wanted him back, genuinely? We can’t know what their relationship was like if we’re being honest. We haven’t seen it. And the people outside of a relationship always view it one way. It’s different when you’re actually part of it,” Jaehyun speaks, and Taeil can see him as he slowly convinces the other jurors. He hates to admit it, but Jaehyun is making sense. “The prosecution paints it one way, the defense another. Neither of them saw it, they just heard stories. It reminds me of this murder case. The Watts family. Online they were painting themselves as the perfect family. And before the cheating husband confessed, he was trying to convince the police that the wife killed the kids. The police ran with that for a bit.”

Holy shit. Holy fucking piece of shit. Jung fucking Jaehyun telling strangers things he and Taeil used to talk about. He remembers the Watts family murders? Does he think about the conversation they had while the documentary played in the background as often as Taeil does?

“Yeah, I saw that on Netflix,” juror number 3 says.

“One story is of a cheating, lying, manipulative partner that made the relationship toxic. The other is a mistake and a misunderstanding that was blown out of proportion,” juror number 7 speaks up for the first time in the meeting, “It’s a who do you believe type of a situation.”

“I’m taking back my vote. I don’t think it’s easy to say she’s guilty anymore,” juror number 3 says.

“Me too. There isn’t enough evidence for it. We’ve just been led to believe that she’s guilty so they can wrap it up and pat themselves on the back,” juror number 10 sounds outraged when he says it, “If she’s innocent, they probably won’t even look for the actual killer.”

Well. So much for going home and quickly getting away from Jaehyun. At the same time, this is the right thing to do.

“We need to stop for a moment and piece together the story as both sides say it and try to figure out what the truth is. We can’t go with the first thing we hear,” Jaehyun says. Natural leader, as always.

“What if what they’re saying is the truth?” Taeil asks. Jaehyun looks at him, his stance softening when their eyes meet.

“The world isn’t that black and white, juror number one. People withhold the truth so they don’t hurt the ones they love. They lie to make themselves feel better too,” Jaehyun tells him. Taeil doesn’t like the way that sounds. There seems to be something he's missing. Maybe it's something he missed back then, “There is no evidence here from the actual murder. No confession. No murder weapon. We can’t put an innocent person in jail, if in fact they are innocent.”

But she’s guilty of something, Taeil’s sure of it. Ten other people aren’t though. So they go with what Jaehyun suggested.

Reconstructing the story from both sides and trying to figure it out is what they spend the next week doing. It kind of feels like they’re stuck. Taeil knows way too much about getting stuck.

* * *

_**4 months, 24 days after the breakup  
**_

**  
**

Thursday nights used to be date nights for him and Jaehyun, just for them on their own. After the break up Taeyong and Ten started taking Taeil out on ‘friend dates’ to cheer him up. Once a week, whenever they can, taking Jaehyun’s place. They take turns organizing, just like Taeil and Jaehyun did.

It was Taeyong’s turn this week. That’s how they end up at a place with bottomless steak fries, just catching up. Ten took them indoor rock climbing the week before, they couldn’t exactly talk there. They were too busy making fools out of themselves.

“So like, you’re not gonna date anymore? Ever?”

Taeil doesn’t have an answer to Ten’s question, exactly. What he wants to say right now is no, but that sounds kind of stupid.

“I’m gonna date. Just not right now,” he says. Taeyong nods at the answer, while Ten has something to say.

“Well, why not? He made you miserable for months, it’s time for you to move on,” Ten insists.

He relied on his friends to help him get back to feeling like himself after the breakup. It wasn’t easy. He had gotten so used to having Jaehyun in his life, it took him a while to readjust to not having him around. To being on his own. It still feels like the breakup just happened. That’s why Ten’s statement takes him aback.

Is it time? Taeil isn’t sure. He is sure that Ten is wrong about one thing though.

“He didn’t make me miserable for months. It was one month, and I wasn’t exactly miserable. I was stressed. He was still loving, kind and considerate, but just kind of out of it.”

“He cheated on you,” Ten reminds him. It’s not like Taeil forgot, but still, thank you, Ten.

“And that jock you dated in college cheated on you, but you still dated him for three more semesters and we didn’t say anything cause you told us not to,” Taeyong reminds him.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Ten pouts, sighing at the memory. Ten must be so relieved these days, being in the third year of a very committed relationship. Too committed. So committed and shameless, Taeil wishes he could unsee some moments.

The group has known each other for long enough that they have stories like that one to pull out whenever they need it. They have each other’s back. Taeil’s grateful that Taeyong’s on his side with this, though Ten means well. Ten sees him sometimes, when sadness creeps back in. He knows why he’s insisting.

But he doesn’t want it yet.

“I’m still in love with him,” Taeil tells his friends, stating what he suspects is obvious to them, “I’m not ready to date.”

“Let me know when you are. I have just the man for you,” Ten tells him with a wink, and Taeil nods, accepting it. Taeyong looks at him, offended.

“And what about me?”

Ten smiles mischievously, then says, “You’re thirsting over Illie’s coworker. You’re his job, not mine.” Taeyong’s jaw drops while Taeil looks between them a few times, an obvious question on his face. Ten clarifies so he doesn’t have to say anything, “The sexy, brooding Japanese guy we met when we picked you up from work last time. Is he single?”

Yuta? Taeyong likes Yuta?

“My work husband?”

“By which you mean y’all have sex in the supply room?” Ten jokes.

“No, by which I mean we share coffee and food, send memes during meetings, and cover for each other when one of us naps in the supply room,” Taeil explains. He and Yuta have a really good friendship going, “I’ll mention you. He’s single. I have a feeling he’ll be interested.”

“By which you mean?” Taeyong smiles, curiosity on his face.

“He might have asked me about the cutie with the blue hair and a really nice smile.”

“And you just didn’t mention it?” Taeyong fakes being offended.

“You didn’t mention it either.”

“Give him my number. And get him a coffee from me.”

“Expect a text from him on Monday. And get him a coffee yourself,” Taeil returns. Ten high-fives him at that.

Spending time with his friends makes him feel so much better about where he is with life.

* * *

Reconstructing the timeline of the day of the murder according to one side takes them two days. According to the other, another two days. Checking both timelines to make sure that they didn't miss anything, another two days. It's time consuming, but that's the easy part. Figuring out what the truth is however is impossible. They don’t even try to figure out the truth, or if Natalie is guilty. They can't.

They decide to answer just one question. Is there enough evidence to say that Natalie might be guilty. Now when he thinks about it, looking at everything laid out in front of him, he wonders how the case even got to a trial. The judge should’ve dismissed it at the preliminary hearing. She should have never been indicted.

What they know is that Jakub Gorski was killed with a knife to the heart and a strand of Natalie’s hair was found on him. What they don’t know is whether or not Natalie is strong enough to have killed him, whether she was in the city when that happened, as the defense claims she wasn’t. The one thing they also know for sure is that knives with the type of blade that was used to kill Gorski are abnormally common. You can get one at the supermarket. That’s exactly what Taeil did on his way back home on the second to last day of the trial. Just for shits and giggles.

Jaehyun was right to question it. Taeil is lowkey proud of him.

He forgot how good Jaehyun was with solving the mysteries and intuitively guessing what happened whenever Taeil told him about murders he was reading about.

* * *

_**6 months, 11 days before the breakup** _

  


For years, Taeil’s favorite way to relax has been to read about true crime, especially murders and missing people cases. When Jaehyun came into his life that didn’t change. What did change was the place where Taeil does the reading. Jaehyun’s bed is just superior.

They exchanged key codes to each other’s apartments after the escape room date, when it became clear that neither of them was going anywhere. There isn’t a discussion about whose place they should spend the night in. It’s more of a text notification. They had spent almost a week straight at Taeil’s. Going to Jaehyun’s apartment was Jaehyun’s idea. Taeil won’t complain, Jaehyun’s bed is nicer, much more comfortable to lay on. It's bigger, and he won’t shut up about it, sure. But Jaehyun also lives in a busier part of town, and it’s really, really fun to go out around here. Date night will automatically become more fun.

“Today might be my least favorite day so far,” Jaehyun announces. He’s still in his suit from work, and he only manages to loosen up his tie before he plops himself down on the bed, and sighs. He looks up at Taeil who’s half sitting in his bed, and gives him a pout. Taeil closes the laptop, then redirects his attention to his boyfriend.

“How can I help?”

“Kisses,” Jaehyun bats his eyelashes at him a few times, “But I need to wash up first, so tell me what you’re reading about.”

Jaehyun rolls out of bed almost immediately. He goes to the bathroom and leaves the door open so Taeil can talk and he can hear. In the meantime, Taeil reopens the laptop and decides how to start telling the story of a murder case so obscure, it doesn’t even have it’s own Wikipedia page. Instead, Taeil is reading from a blog.

“Have you heard about the Anna Palmer murder?”

“You know I haven’t,” Jaehyun returns. Taeil smiles at that, unsure why.

“Okay. We’re talking about 1998, September 10th. Anna Palmer was ten years old at the time. She called her mom at work to ask if she could play with the neighborhood kids. Their neighborhood was really safe, so her mom said yes, as long as she was home by 7 that night.” Taeil takes a moment to find his spot in the blog post, before he continues. “When her mom came back home, she found Anna’s body on the porch, in a pool of her own blood. She was stabbed five times, including once to the throat. It was so deep it cut her spinal cord.”

Jaehyun shows up in the doorway then. He’s unbuttoning his shirt with a puzzled look on his face.

“It was a child predator, wasn’t it?” he asks. It catches Taeil off guard. He hadn’t even mentioned that part yet. How did Jaehyun know? “It sounds like it was a child predator. Stabbing her that many times? The murderer must have liked hurting kids.”

It sounds so obvious when he says it like that.

“It was, you’re right,” Taeil wants to smile at him and tell him he’s proud of him for making the connection. But the subject at hand doesn’t prompt a smile. The murder was solved, but the details are still gory and really sad. “She was assaulted. And a repeat offense is how they caught him. The DNA they took from him because of a molestation charge matched DNA they collected from Anna’s fingernails. He was nineteen at the time and lived in the neighborhood. He was in prison when they made the connection,” Taeil finishes the story with that and closes the laptop again. He looks towards Jaehyun, eyes landing on his naked torso before he covers it with a shirt and knowingly smirks at Taeil. Taeil clears his throat before he adds, “You made the connection really quickly.”

Jaehyun shrugs, then says, “I’ve heard about enough cases, I guess.”

“This might be your superpower, Jung. You could have been a detective.”

“It’s never too late for anything, Moon.”

* * *

Once they finish the timeline and talk the case over, bringing up things they saw in court from Natalie’s behavior and the Gorski family’s mannerisms, they take another vote. Taeil counts the ballots again.

This time, it’s twelve pieces of paper that say no. According to the twelve people in this room Natalie Gorski isn’t guilty.

“Is everyone satisfied with this decision?” juror number 2 asks the room. They all nod.

“Can we go over it just once more?” juror number 7 returns with a question of her own, “I just want to leave this room without any regrets.”

“I think that’s a good idea,” juror number 9 confirms.

That’s what they do. They go through the events and vote one last time.

They decide that Natalie Gorski is innocent, and this isn't just Taeil's decision. This isn't on him. He can't get into his head about this.

* * *

_**1 year, 2 months, 27 days before the breakup  
**_

  


****

****

“We’re together right?”

They’re lying in bed, cuddling as they’re coming down from the high of their first time together. And boy was it a high. Taeil is afraid to try to walk to the bathroom. Jaehyun will have to carry him.

It might not be the best moment to have this conversation, but Taeil is in his own head right now. He realized that he started to develop feelings for Jaehyun about a week ago, and what happened now just cements it. Once he’s in his head, Taeil can’t get out. So yes, this might not be the best moment for the conversation, but it is happening.

Jaehyun uses the arm he has around Taeil’s waist to pull him closer until they’re glued to each other again. Taeil looks up at him, expecting a reaction. He doesn’t get it though. Jaehyun keeps his eyes closed and he keeps the smirk on his face intact. It’s not what Taeil expected.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, we’re boyfriends. We’re together. We can meet each other’s friends and you’re not doing this with anyone else.”

Jaehyun chuckles at that. If he wasn’t so pretty, Taeil would punch him for it.

“We’re together Taeil, we’re boyfriends. I’m not doing this with anyone else, and I expect you not to do it either.”

“I’m not.”

Jaehyun’s smile widens, his dimples becoming really prominent. Taeil smiles back at him.

His feelings are growing stronger by the moment.

* * *

The moment Taeil reads out the jury verdict and declares Natalie Gorski as not guilty, Natalie starts to cry. And it’s really difficult to say if it’s relief or something else.

He’s the only one looking at her. Most of the jurors are looking at the Gorskis, at Jakub’s parents who are acting… weird. They’re yelling at them for declaring her not guilty. Taeil isn’t sure how he feels about it. But the facts, the way they were laid out for them, weren’t enough to declare her guilty.

Jaehyun isn't looking at them though, or at Natalie. Jaehyun uses that moment to look at Taeil. Taeil looks back, one last time before this ends.

The judge throws them out of the courtroom quickly, and they wrap up the trial.

Natalie Gorski gets to go home.

So does Taeil. He doesn’t have to see Jaehyun again.

* * *

_**1 year, 1 month, 13 days before the breakup** _

  


“This is Johnny and his boyfriend Doyoung, and that’s Mark. Everyone, this is Taeil.”

“Nice to meet you,” Taeil smiles at them.

Jaehyun’s friends are welcoming and kind towards him. They talk to him during the entire night and get to know him as much as they can. Taeil expected this bit of the relationship to be the scariest one. But in the middle of dinner he decides he has nothing to worry about. It’s going really well, and even if it wasn’t, he has Jaehyun right next to him. Jaehyun won’t let him fail.

Out of the people in Jaehyun’s circle, Taeil hits it off with Mark most. Later, when the two friend groups merge, Mark becomes everyone’s favorite. Caring and bubbly, he's the one that keeps in touch with Taeil at least once a week, bridging whatever gap exists between the friend groups. They especially get close when Mark starts having some issues with a class at college and Taeil offers to help him. Mark took a few gap years to travel and find himself before college. Taeil knows that can make it hard to get on track with studying and homework. He wants to help. Maybe that’s one of the reasons why he gets so close to Jaehyun’s friends.

Hitting it off with the friend groups can be a really tricky thing, Taeil knows this from experience with his own, and his friends’ relationships. This time there is no issue at all.

Nothing goes wrong in his and Jaehyun’s relationships, Taeil can’t help but notice. Everything works in their favor.

Up until the last month.

* * *

Taeil is wrong to think that he won’t see Jaehyun again after the trail. He sees him just a week after the trial ends, in his local supermarket, of all places.

He’s minding his business in the snack aisle, and as he’s deciding how much chips he wants to get, Jaehyun shows up. And if that wasn’t enough, he’s in his usual work attire, suit and tie. Taeil’s weaknesses are all being tested.

“Hey.”

Taeil’s heart starts beating so fast he’s afraid it’s obvious.

“Hi,” he returns. He attempts to swallow down the lump in his throat, another thing he hopes Jaehyun won’t notice. He clears his throat and asks, “You live around here?”

“No,” Jaehyun shakes his head, “I work at the holding across the street. I’m just picking up some things before going home.”

“I see.”

Makes sense. He would’ve seen him before if he lived around here. The working here surprises him though. What happened to working at his parents’ company?

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t going to disturb you, but I saw what you’re wearing and I thought I’d give it a shot.”

Taeil looks down at himself, and only realizes it then. Jaehyun’s cardigan. He was feeling like shit after coming from work, so he put it on to make himself feel better. He still does it. No one knows that he still has the cardigan, or that he uses it. Now, Jaehyun does.

“Do you want it back?”

“No, that’s not…” Jaehyun gets interrupted by one of the store clerks walking through the aisle. “Can we talk?”

“About what?”

“I just want to tell you something.” The mystery of what Jaehyun wants to say makes Taeil say yes. “I’m gonna go check out. I’ll wait for you outside.”

“I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

Jaehyun walks away, and Taeil does his best to hurry up. The exchange helps him decide that he should double up on junk food, cause he’s going to eat some of the feelings that are creeping back in.

It’s impossible not to feel nervous about it. Taeil has no clue what Jaehyun wants to talk about, and that’s what scares him more than anything. Is it good? Is it bad?

Just like he promised, Jaehyun waits for him outside. Taeil’s heartbeat speeds up even more as he approaches him. Jaehyun is nervous too, Taeil knows him well enough that he can see it. It makes him really curious.

“I didn’t cheat on you,” Jaehyun states.

Wait. What?

But he said he did.

It scares Taeil is that he seems genuine now. Much more genuine than he did then.

“Why did you tell me that you did?”

“Cause it was easier than to tell you the truth,” Jaehyun says, seconding it with a sigh, “My life was kind of falling apart. My parents cut me off when I came out. Jesus, I didn’t even come out cause I wanted to, my brother told them about it,” he says. This is all brand new information to Taeil. Why didn’t Jaehyun say anything? He wouldn’t have ended it if he knew. “I lost my job and I had to move out from the apartment. That’s why we didn’t go to mine anymore, I wasn’t hiding anyone or any signs of cheating. I was just switching between sleeping in my car, on Johnny’s couch, and on Mark’s floor.”

It breaks Taeil a little that Jaehyun remembers exactly what he said to him. Then again, Taeil remembers too.

Maybe they’re exactly the same.

“You didn’t tell me any of that.”

“I should’ve. I have no doubt that you would’ve helped me and we’d still be together. But you didn’t remind me of what was happening, and I needed that too. You were the only thing that kept me afloat. It was easier for me to let go and drown than to fight. I didn’t want you to drown with me.”

It breaks Taeil’s heart. It worries him too. He didn’t know Jaehyun could be so self-deprecating.

“Jaehyun. You’re an idiot,” Taeil says to him and receives a smile in response, one that lets him know Jaehyun understands he’s only joking to an extent. They’ve both been idiots. But Jaehyun should have never hidden this.

“I just needed you to know that I didn’t cheat on you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me and I would never do that to you.” It sounds like he’s starting to say goodbye. Taeil doesn’t want to let him, “It was nice seeing you again.”

“You can’t just say that and leave,” Taeil interrupts him.

“Why not?”

Cause it’s the same for me, he wants to say. Cause you were at your lowest and I didn’t see it. Cause I made you leave when you needed me. But he doesn’t say any of it. Instead he offers a bullshit excuse.

“It’s a lot. I have nothing better to do and I want to know more about what happened. What’s going on right now?”

“Well, I was just on the jury of this murder trial but I’m not allowed to talk about it in detail.”

“I’m serious, Jae.”

“It’s not really exciting. It’s like double the boring it used to be.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Taeil insists, “There’s this bakery a few blocks away. They make these really nice salted caramel tarts,” he makes an offer Jaehyun will like.

“I have a soft spot for caramel. It makes me slutty.”

“I remember,” he jokingly winks at him. Jaehyun’s ears give him away, so Taeil makes it an offer he will not refuse, “I’ll buy.”

The bit of humor in the conversation makes them feel as close as they used to be, Taeil assumes when he hears Jaehyun’s reply.

“Free caramel makes me extra slutty.”

It feels a bit like a flirt.

“I remember that too.” Taeil flirts back. But that’s where the flirting ends.

For the remainder of the night they talk like best friends who haven’t seen each other in years. That’s exactly what they are in a way.

They go over what happened again, and they talk about Jaehyun’s reasoning. It helps Taeil understand. They talk about Jaehyun being more independent and working on fixing his relationship with his parents. He’s happy for him. He’s proud too.

In the end they exchange numbers, promising to be friends. But Taeil wants more, and he knows it immediately.

He’ll always want more. He'll always remember everything about him too.

* * *

_**8 months, 4 days before the breakup** _

  


“What were you thinking?”

Taeil shouldn’t be trying not to laugh at Jaehyun and how frustrated he is at the moment. But that’s exactly what he’s doing.

“I thought I was relaxing by indulging myself. But that’s the most frustrating case I’ve ever read about. There’s so much misinformation and theories that you’re apparently not allowed to have.” Jaehyun is ranting and pacing around Taeil’s living room. It’s cute. And kind of funny. By some luck, or lack thereof, Jaehyun ended up reading about what might be the worst missing person’s case that has ever existed. Even the Madeleine McCain case isn’t as frustrating as the Maura Murray case. “The sheriff is like the most incompetent person ever. Everyone that’s related to the case is an absolute asshole. Her family and friends are hiding shit, it’s so obvious, but they’re acting all high and mighty then complain when people don’t like them. And then there’s that investigative blogger dude who's just the worst. Taeil, I hate that guy.”

Jaehyun says it so perfectly, Taeil has nothing to add. He hates that guy too.

“I wish you called before you did your own digging. I would’ve told you to stay away from that one. I stay away from that one.”

Jaehyun stops pacing. As he looks at Taeil his stance softens. It appears that he’s calming down.

“You get what I’m saying?”

“I get what you’re saying,” Taeil confirms and gives him a smile, “Let’s go for a walk. We’ll get some desserts and talk this one out a few times.”

“Can I complain about her dad?”

“Yes, you can. I’ll complain about him with you.”

That’s exactly what they do. They dissect the known details of the case, and Taeil helps him with his own experience reading about the disappearance.

But what really helps bring Jaehyun’s spirits up is the desert. A few months into dating Taeil recognized the pattern. Put anything with caramel in it in front of the man and he’ll feel better almost immediately. You might even get him to show you his pretty dimples.

* * *

Taeil can’t stop thinking about the conversation he had with Jaehyun. He thinks about what happened, about what he didn’t know.

Jaehyun’s life fell apart. And Taeil broke up with him over it. Basically. And he feels guilty about it. So much so that it starts being obvious to the people around him.

“Are you okay?” Taeyong asks him. Taeil recognizes his worried tone of voice too well, “You seem a little distracted.”

“Is this about the trial? Did you let a murderer walk free?” Ten attempts to lighten the mood, but he’s not overly successful. Cause Ten gets it right, without even trying.

“It is about the trial, but it has nothing to do with the trial itself.” Taeil takes a deep breath, preparing himself for the scolding of his lifetime. “Jaehyun was on the jury too.”

Both of his friends need a moment to digest the news.

“Holy shit,” Ten is the first one to speak, laughing right after, “I didn’t think it was possible.”

Taeil explains exactly what happened. He leaves out the details of the case, telling them as much as he can. Then he talks about the meeting outside the supermarket, and how they went to get dessert and talked. He talks about what really happened, and not just the assumptions he made that Jaehyun just confirmed because he didn’t want to fight or tell the truth.

His friend’s opinions seem to change on the spot, just like his opinions did. But he doesn’t expect them to say that they say.

“Do it,” Taeyong tells him.

“Do what?”

“You never moved on, Illie. You never stopped loving him either. If he really didn’t cheat on you, do it. Get back together with him.”

“Not that you need our permission.” Ten offers. “Jaehyun wasn’t bad. Except at the end, and even then you said it yourself. He was just kind of out of it, but he still was kind and loving to you. And I know what I’ve said about him, but knowing what I know now, what happened makes sense. Minus the lie. And…” Ten pauses for an overly dramatic effect, then says something none of them ever thought would hear him say, “I was wrong.”

Ten fakes a shudder, earning a smile from Taeil, and a pat on the back from Taeyong.

Ten’s right, Taeil doesn’t need their permission. But he’s glad that they see it the same way as him, that they’d do what he wants to do.

“I’ll think about it,” he promises.

“Can we hang out with his friends again if you get back together?” Taeyong asks, and adds, “I miss Mark.”

All three of them agree that Mark is the one they miss the most, then change subjects to talking about Ten and his upcoming nuptials. Taeil feels lighter after telling them. Especially because Jaehyun gave him the type of love he never thought he’d get.

He wants him and Jaehyun to try again.

* * *

_**4 months, 18 days before the breakup** _

  


On the morning of the one-year anniversary of the day they met, Taeil wakes up next to Jaehyun. He sits up in bed, moving slowly so he doesn’t wake him up, and he looks down at him. Jaehyun looks so peaceful asleep, Taeil can’t help but notice.

He sits calmly like that for a few minutes, unable to look elsewhere, unable to move. He lets the feeling of happiness grow and consume him. He’s so lucky to have him in his life, Jaehyun makes him so happy. He feels safe and understood, and so, so loved. He loves the life they have together, he wonders how long it will last. He hopes it’ll be forever.

“I can feel you looking at me,” Jaehyun says, shaking him out of the growingly sentimental thoughts brewing in his head. “Good morning, love.”

“Good morning,” Taeil returns. Jaehyun opens his eyes then, allowing them to adjust to the light. It’s so adorable, Taeil thinks, “Happy anniversary, Jae.”

“Happy anniversary.”

“I love you so much,” Taeil smiles at him. He scoots down, making himself available for a kiss.

“I love you too,” Jaehyun smiles back at him.

They spend the day in the apartment, mostly in bed. He has no worries on his mind for the entirety of the day. Nothing else on his mind besides Jaehyun, how happy he is and how much he loves him.

He wishes he could have a life with Jaehyun, one that will last for the remainder of their own little eternity.

* * *

Taeil thinks about it. And thinks about it. Then he thinks about it some more.

He fails to come up with a scenario in his head that doesn't end well. Now that he knows what the issue was last time, he knows how to fix it. Miscommunication. Assumptions. In theory, those are easy things to fix. All Taeil needs to do is stop looking at his relationship like it’s a cold case he needs to solve. He trusted Jaehyun. He trusts Jaehyun. Jaehyun is the love of his life, there won't be anyone like him. He can't believe that it ended, and in the manner that it did. He could’ve just asked before he decided on his own. Then it wouldn’t have ended.

With all that in mind he’s still uncertain. He has never gotten back together with an ex. He doesn’t know how to go about it. He has no one to ask about it either. He just needs some friendly advice that’ll translate like a little push.

He looks at Yuta over the cubicle, wanting to ask him for advice, but his lips refuse to move. Yuta is working anyway, his eyes focused on the screen. So Taeil looks down at his own.

It doesn’t matter. He’ll figure it out sooner or later.

He looks over at the spreadsheet, trying to find the place where he stopped before his thoughts went elsewhere. Just as he does, Yuta stands up from his chair and leans over to chat.

“They caught the killer for the Gorski case,” he announces with a smile. Wait. What? Taeil’s confused, so he can only stare at him in disbelief, waiting for more details. Yuta delivers exactly that. “This dude confessed to everything, including trying to set up Gorski's girlfriend. He was apparently hired to do it. They’re not saying more, but people online think the Gorski family is involved.” Jaehyun was right all along. She really was innocent. The letter was true, she did want him back. It’s not just that there wasn’t enough evidence. Taeil has so many thoughts in his head, all jumbled up. He’s looking at Yuta blankly, sitting still, and Yuta calls him out. “Taeil. Are you listening? I know you love this stuff, I thought you’d like to know.”

He clears his throat before saying, “Yeah, I am listening. I’m just surprised. I was dead set on the girlfriend being guilty,” he tells Yuta. He was really set on it, at first. The lack of evidence raised some flags, but he still thought she did it. But she wasn’t lying. Her mistake was just a mistake, it wasn’t lack of love. Even though it was a fucked up mistake. “Send me the link to the article.”

“Already did,” Yuta says. He looks at Taeil once more before he takes a seat. It makes Taeil wonder how obvious he’s being.

Somewhere underneath the clouds that were covering his recollection of him Taeil knew that Jaehyun was right.

Taeil doesn’t know why, but that does it for him.

He takes out his phone and texts Jaehyun.

_  
_ _ Are you free tomorrow night? I’d like to take you out for dinner. _

He sends the text and stares at the screen for about a minute. He decides it doesn’t sound right, so he sends in another one to clear things up.

_ Like on a date. _

That doesn’t add enough context for his liking, so he triple texts.

_ I’m sorry for doing this over text, and I completely forgot to ask the other day but if you’re not single then disregard this entire thing. _ _  
_ _ But if you are single then I’d like to date you again. Maybe even boyfriend you up, I don’t know. I just miss you and I still love you, and yeah. _ _  
_ _ Please let me know. _ _  
_ _ I’m really sorry for not being there for you at your lowest. _ _  
_ _ And if we give this a shot, I’d love it if we can work on the miscommunication issue. _

Taeil can’t take the wait. He locks his phone and puts it in his desk drawer. He can’t think about the answer he’s going to get right now. He’ll do it later.

That determination only lasts him an hour.

_ Hey Illie. I was in a meeting, or I would’ve answered right away. Yes, I’m single. I’m not even remotely seeing anyone. Yes, I’d love to date you again. I’d love it if you boyfriend me up again. I miss you and I still love you too. I never stopped. _ _  
_ _ I promise you, we’ll work on it. I won’t hide anything from you, we’ll talk about things before they become an issue. _ _  
_ _ But I’m not free tomorrow night per se. It’s Mark’s birthday, I’m supposed to be at his at eight. _ _  
_ _ We can grab an early dinner before and go to the party together if you’d like. I know my friends would love to see you again, especially Mark. He had a soft spot for you. _

_ I’d like that.  
_ _ I was just talking to Taeyong and Ten about how much we miss Mark. _

_ Then it’s a date. _ _  
_ _ I miss your friends too. _ _  
_ _ I miss joking around with Yuta. _

_ Oooh!!  
Yuta and Taeyong are dating now. They have been for a while. _

_ Whaaaat? _ _  
_ _ You’re not separating work friends and real life friends anymore? _ _  
_ _ You let go of your work husband so easily? _

_ No, I’m still separating them lol _ _  
_ _ But they saw each other on accident and I’m not heartless _

_ No, you’re not _

_ Congratulations on being right about Natalie Gorski, by the way _ _  
_ _ She’s innocent _

_ What happened with the Gorski case? _

_ Well, get this _

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading.
> 
> find me here too: [twitter](https://twitter.com/newct127) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.qa/newct127)
> 
> i promise the first chapter of the taeil is liziqi fic is what's coming next.


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